Substantive Masculinity: the quality of selflessness

We need to start talking about substantive masculinity, not superficial masculinity, and not using materialistic definitions of what makes a man a high value male. And we need to stop thinking that masculinity is a synonym for whatever women find attractive as if the objective of being a man is to attract women. Women don't define for us what makes a man a man anymore than non Muslims can define for us what Islam is. A huge portion of what I see on the manosphere online is focused on defining men according to their relationships vis a vis women, their ability to attract them, to control them, to make them submissive and respectful and so on. It's all really just a cleaned up version of how to be a pimp.

Okay. So let's start with this. If you are obsessed with women, you're not a mature man. If one of the biggest, most continuous challenges in your life is winning a power struggle with your wife, you haven't grown up yet. If you're primarily concerned with female attention, attraction, and approval, you're an adolescent.

See, this is why we can't let Western non Muslims set the masculine agenda for us. They are an immature people. Their civilization has failed to civilize them. If you listen to them, all you will learn about being a man is how to attract materialistic, shallow, silly women as if this makes you a real man. Men's reality compared to the action movie trailer of Western masculinity is stark, unglamorous.

It's as stark and unglamorous as the mud from which we were created. And, yes, we should look at the history of Nabi Adam because he represents the core of masculinity, the prototype, the primary coding of man. And the story of the creation of tells us the proper nature of the relationship between men and women. Allah didn't say that he created so that Adam would have something to do. She was created to help him with what he was created to do and to be a source of repose for him because what he actually has to do and what he was created for is hard.

Studying the story of Nabi Adam really deserves its own series of videos, not just one. The high honored status that Allah gave Nabi Adam thus to men was nothing more than to make him the most accountable and responsible slave. And what is the quality? What is the most essential necessary quality that someone would have to have as the most accountable and responsible slave if you want to be successful and please your lord? Selflessness.

It's no wonder then that selflessness is identified as the essence of chivalry, and chivalry is a concept that the Europeans learn from the Muslims. So the alpha maleists and the red pillars say that men should big themselves up. They should dominate. They should lay down the law. They should put their own happiness and satisfaction first.

Okay. Does that sound to you like the most accountable and responsible slave? No. That's not masculine. That's not manly.

That's childish. The foundation of masculinity is servitude, to be a slave. Not to big oneself up, but to minimize oneself. Not to put one's own happiness and satisfaction first, but to put the happiness and satisfaction of others first and yours last. It's not to dominate, it's to serve.

The essence of masculinity is selflessness.